@BaseballCPA needs your help - Page 3

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  • #173288
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Ok, you’re all about to be exposed to a side of me you’ve never seen! A serious side *gasp* I know, I know…it’s true.

    Here’s my problem. I’ve been dating the same girl for the past 2 years and things have been pretty good. We went to school together, Master’s program together, we’re both CPAs, etc. But other than that, we have NOTHING in common, which would be fine, but we differ on some really fundamental issues. For example, I’m Catholic…I’m not going to lie and say I’m a devout Catholic who goes to Church every Sunday, but I have a strong faith in God and ultimately I want to go back to Church on a regular basis and when the time comes that I get married, I want it to be in the Catholic Church. Likewise, when I have kids, I want to have them baptized and raise them Catholic. She does not believe in God, does NOT want to get married in a Church, and will sure as hell not raise our (potential) future kids Catholic. This poses one hell of a problem for me. But recently, we’ve uncovered a bigger problem, the extent of our political differences. HOLY MOTHER OF ALL HELL is she a friggin’ lib if I’ve ever seen one. Normally I wouldn’t care, but she gets mad if I e-mail something along that is of conservative nature. Like what the mother effing hell? I can’t even express my opinions?

    I don’t know folks…maybe this one ain’t goin the distance. I care about her (true story), but we seem to differ on some really serious friggin’ issues. Throw some advice at ol’ Baseball šŸ™‚

Viewing 15 replies - 31 through 45 (of 95 total)
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  • #363943
    jeff
    Keymaster

    Don't forget to get your class ring and letter jacket back.

    #363944
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    This thread is actually kind of scary. Marriage, kids, etc….that means no PS3, no Miami Beach parties, mini vans, diapers, wedding, inlaws….scary story for real…

    #363945
    futuremdcpa
    Member

    @CPATerminator – Who said such a thing? Its called a second cell phone, and “late nights at work.” … KIDDING OFFCOURSE!

    REG: PASS || BEC: PASS || AUD: PASS || F: SCORE PENDING..

    #363946
    jeff
    Keymaster
    #363947
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    ooohhhh babe, don't leave now cuz I need you!! ooohhh babe, why are your running awayyyyyyyyyyy?????babe…***guitars and drums*

    #363948

    BaseballCPA2,

    I am also dating a CPA(candidate) and we went to school together. We were friends for years before dating. We do share the same religious beliefs and I think it is really important. It sounds like you feel the same way too. I'm not saying a couple has to match exactly, some differences make the relationship healthy. But I wouldnt give in on the important stuff. I know it is really comforting to be with someone who can relate to your work field, but you never know you can find another CPA. You have some great advice on this post. I wish you all the best, and I hope you find happiness in whatever you choose.

    CA CPA - All because of the journey listed below
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------
    FAR - 53('10), 8/25/12 79 PASSED!
    REG - 66('11), 69('12), 12/06/12 77 PASSED!!
    BEC - 58('10), 74('12), 01/05/13 77 PASSED!!!
    AUD - 43('11), 66('12), 69('13), 74('13) 7/29/13 85 PASSED!!!!!

    (Combinations of Roger, Yaeger, Wiley Book, Wiley TB, & NINJA Notes)

    Ethics 90%

    #363949
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I'm going to go against the crowd and say that the relationship could work as long as you both are willing to accept the differences in each other. The religion won't be such a big deal as long as you don't force the other to change. In the future, she could let you take the kids to church and you can let her educate the kids on other religions in the world (as long as she doesn't say anything bad about your religion in the process.) Your kids will eventually be able to decide for themselves anyway. The politics would be even less of a problem. It's healthy to be able to debate both sides of an issue in a peaceful manner. Make sure this isn't all that you talk about though.

    I've seen it work. My parents have different political views and different religions but they've been together 25+ years.

    I also agree with the people saying there are some other problems and this is just an excuse. While these differences aren't a big issue, her unwillingness to discuss it could be a big problem.

    #363950
    LittleMoe
    Member

    Please, PLEASE don't stay with her because you have time invested and think that's what you *should* do. Do what is right for you. If you are not sure, figure it out but don't just go with the flow. The longer you stay with someone, the harder it gets to break those ties. You can love someone but not be in love with them. And I think that breaking up with someone you truly care about is one of the hardest things ever. I've been there.

    I thought it was good enough that we were still together and getting along after a couple of years. We loved each other. But, it wasn't enough. I was young but even back then I think I knew it deep down. I got married anyway because I thought that's what you were supposed to do. 9 years later, I finally reached my breaking point and asked for a divorce. THE hardest thing I have ever done. These days, I am happily single and he is remarried and seems happy too.

    All that to say, don't let it get to that point. The longer you wait, the deeper you are in a relationship and the more it sucks to have to end it. If you know that is the right choice for you, do her a favor and do it now. Don't wait.

    AUD 4/12/12 79
    FAR 5/29/12 76
    REG 8/2/12 82
    BEC 8/30/12 72 Retake 10/18/12 76!!! DONE!!!!
    ExamMatrix, Wiley Books, NINJA notes and audio
    LICENSED ALABAMA CPA 11/30/12

    #363951
    mmcgrad1
    Member

    “Please, PLEASE don't stay with her because you have time invested and think that's what you *should* do.”

    Wow, BEC is making me sick in the head. I immediately thought sunk costs when I read this.

    NIU CPA Review Correspondence is awesome!

    I passed all four sections on the first attempt

    #363952
    sarah210
    Member

    I should add, you never know how much someone is willing to compromise until you ask. My husband I don't have the same religious or political beliefs, but he is fine with us raising the future hypothetical kids in the church.

    REG- 53, 91
    BEC- 88
    FAR- 62, 85
    AUD- 85

    Ethics- 93

    #363953
    posty
    Member

    If it were just political differences, I'd say stay with her – just as long as neither of you take your politics too seriously. But religious views are fundamental to how people live their lives and treat others – including their spouses. I would let her down easy and look for a girl with similar religious views. Good luck!

    FAR - 78 (10/3/11)
    AUD - 83 (11/28/11)
    REG - 70 (4/7/12), 84 (7/31/12)
    BEC - 75! (5/31/12)
    Ethics - 98

    DONE

    #363954
    jokami
    Member

    @BaseballCPA2

    Dump her…

    B - 62, 70, 72, 79!!!
    A - 68, 81
    R - 70, 82
    F - 84

    "The limit to your abilities is where you place them" - Fortune Cookies

    #363955
    holmea52
    Member

    I feel like those are somewhat major issues to have such polarized views on; however, I definitely know people who have made relationships work with “issues” like those! I guess I would say that since you both are clearly well aware of the views of the other, and it has worked for this amount of time, there's definitely a shot. But it's also important to remember that a lot of people don't realize more major differences in opinion until marriage and children come into the picture. That being said, if you feel like there's not a very strong foundation now, it might not work once other issues come up. I feel like you might already know what direction you're leaning toward…if you know now that you don't see yourself marrying her and raising children together, it might be best to move on : /

    Hope that you are happy with whatever decision you do go with!

    F - PASSED (11/26/11)
    A - PASSED (1/14/12)
    B - PASSED (7/14/12)
    R - PASSED (8/31/12)
    Ethics Exam - 95 %

    Just waiting to be able to put those three little letters behind my name...

    #363956
    jokami
    Member

    @holmea52

    Sorry, respectfully disagree… They never work, sooner or later they brake up!!!

    B - 62, 70, 72, 79!!!
    A - 68, 81
    R - 70, 82
    F - 84

    "The limit to your abilities is where you place them" - Fortune Cookies

    #363957
    Trisha
    Participant

    It's either a matter of comprimise or ending it. My husband and I have 2 children and share similar political and religious views. We are very spiritual people, but dont participate in organized religion. Recently, our 7 yo daughter became friends with a little girl who is Baptist, and began questioning us about Jesus and the Bible. Her only real exposure to this has been through my dads wife, who is Catholic, and just about Christmas and its meaning. This little girl and her Grandma brought over a bible, which our daughter began reading. My husband and I discussed how to handle this (communication is KEY). We decided that if she wanted to learn more, we would nurture that because ultimately she is her own person and will have her own beliefs.

    Point of my story is this… If she is worth it, discuss how you would approach raising children. If there is some sort of comprimise and open mindedness (on both sides) maybe it can work. But it will be a constant point of contention, and you have to ask if you are willing to deal with that to be with her… From the sounds of it though, you have already figured it out… Best of luck to you! Also ~ be kind and HONEST in ending it… Karma is a b~tch!!!

    REG 72, 86 and DONE!!!
    BEC 80 šŸ™‚
    FAR 72, 78 šŸ™‚
    AUD 73, 76 šŸ™‚

Viewing 15 replies - 31 through 45 (of 95 total)
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