[hope]

Hey everyone,

I guess before I begin, I want to share a little bit about myself. I graduated top 20% of my class. Got an offer from a big four. Life was great and I felt like I was on top of the world. But all that changed after I graduated. I was studying and working at the same. Life was just totally miserable. After failing the first two parts, my morale and motivation just totally dropped. It became so bad that it affected my work performance. With my fear becoming reality, I got laid off. At that point, I just went into depression without telling anyone, because of the expectations that I needed to live up to, for my friends and family. Didn’t want to tell them the truth that I got laid off, I told them that I just resigned and wanted to focus on my exam. Also didn’t want to reschedule my exam for the failed parts (since I scheduled for all four), I just went ahead and took the rest thinking now that I don’t have a job now and have all day. But with my head still in the gutter, I failed the next two parts. All four parts with the scores of between 71-73.

This all feels like a dream. How can one moment I can be on top of the world and the next feeling like the biggest loser. I used Beckers for my studying material, because everyone I knew recommended it. I used to be so motivated and stuck to my studying schedule, but now, I can’t even finish one section without taking a break or procrastinating. I also understand that my friends who also is taking the exam can be a great help and a source of energy, but it can also be so demoralizing, because everyone of them has already passed, with their first try. I am truly happy for them, but at the same time, I just feel so dumb. Instead of scheduling for all four parts at once, I am now scheduling two parts at a time now (advise that I got from friends and through this site).

Every night in my bed, I would just think about everything that has happened and it would just hurt so much. Maybe accounting just isn’t something for me? And just recently as everything was turning so dark, some light shed. During mid December when my REG scored was released, I passed with a 76. At that point, I just don’t know what I should be feeling. Yes, I was happy, because I knew that was one down and three to go. But also at the same time, I felt so sad because when I was working for the big four, I was in tax, so this should’ve been my strongest part out of the four. At that point, I just don’t know how I will survive the remaining parts.

Sorry if this was lengthy and boring, but I just needed a place to vent. I don’t know how much longer I can keep this smile up for my family and friends, because I am just totally breaking down. With FARE being my next part and a few weeks away, I just need some advise and motivation to carry on. I tried taking a break, going to the gym, etc, but I am still feeling the same. I am just out of ideas so any inputs will be appreciated. Thanks in advance.

[Jaywalk]

Glad to read your latest post about feeling better, hope. It seems like writing down how you felt was an important step to help you start feeling better.

With me, I think writing during difficult times helps to clear my head, so I can better focus on changing to a more positive attitude. Writing also serves as a reminder later on that things aren't always so easy in life and that it took hard work to get where I am. Because when things are going good, it can be easy to forget those times that helped build your character.

I agree with dwadecpa that if you can get into a Big4 firm, you probably interview well. Hold onto what you write and save these stories for future interviews. They can help convey parts of your life where you experienced the entire spectrum of life's highs and lows. It shows that in the face of adversity, you can work hard to achieve something when you choose to.

Best of luck, hope. I will keep a look-out for your post in the “I Passed the CPA Exam” forum.

BEC 78 - 11/27/2008 | AUD 84 - 08/10/2009
REG 82 - 11/23/2009 | FAR 84 - 01/19/2010
-| Passed all sections |-

[ineedadrink]

It's been at least a week since the last post, but I feel compelled to add to this convo … The best thing about this site is realizing no matter how sh***y this test can make you feel, someone else is in the same situation.

I also always got great grades easily, but this test has been a beast for me. I didn't even get any job offers and spent all my time from when I graduated last June until December studying full time (with Becker, because it's “the best”), getting a 71 on aud, 74 on far and 71 on bec. The mounting costs were overwhelming me and not having a job was not helping my motivation, either. I had convinced myself that if I failed reg, the easiest thing to do would be to quit, because I just couldn't take any more rejection.

Then I too got a 76 on reg, and there is no way finding out that I passed the last one will feel anywhere near as good as finally getting one out of the way. I realized I'd spent way too much time, effort and money to let this thing beat me, and I will pass it if it kills me. Take your time with your study schedule, feel free to give yourself breaks, and don't let this define your life. I have taken pressure off myself, and have made the test an off-limits topic with my friends who passed easily — and when I walked out of aud Rd. 2 on Saturday, I felt more relaxed than I've ever felt.

By the way, I finally got a job in private, and not getting hired by the big 4 was the best thing that ever happened to me.

REG: 76 (would have lost credit 5/31)
AUD: 71, 78
BEC: 74, 81
FAR: 74, 61, 66, 69, 75 DONE

[hope]

Hey ineedadrink, congratz on your job! I am definitely looking toward in getting a job in private too. But the thing is that it's really hard to get in, usually requires 2-3 yrs of experience which I lack. I also lack the work experience to get a instant cpa if I passed all four parts (xxx hrs of audit hrs or x yrs of tax/other experience. I am thinking this varies by states?).

Anywho, I feel the same way as you in must get this cpa if it kills me! lol. I am the first in my family to grad from college, so I really do want to make my parents proud! And Jaywalk, I am pretty sure we will look back at these times and laugh about it. =D This is like running a marathon. We just have to keep our mind focus. It's only a matter of time before we will see that finish line and pass it! Until then, we'll just have to take it one step at a time.

[PursuitCPA]

I hope your right.

CPA EXAM - Passed

[ineedadrink]

hope — the job will come! I started interviewing October 2008 before my June 09 graduation, and it was just this past December that I got hired … OK, that doesn't sound very encouraging, but I am just trying to say that whoever ends up hiring you will value your perserverance, and for me it's like, OF COURSE I was supposed to be unemployed for that long, because ending up in this awesome, awesome company was worth the wait, and I don't even NEED my CPA, but they are total cheerleaders for me as I'm doing it. So I will be your cheerleader, and let you know that a couple years from now, you will look back at this speed bump in your life and realize everything worked out the way it was supposed to.

By the way, your parents are already proud of you 🙂

REG: 76 (would have lost credit 5/31)
AUD: 71, 78
BEC: 74, 81
FAR: 74, 61, 66, 69, 75 DONE

[Anonymous]

Because the other forum “I passed the CPA exam” if for people that have passed.. I can't post in there yet.. but I wanted to say Congratulations and I can't wait to be like you someday!!!!!

Enjoy life the worst is over, right?

[Anonymous]

I know exactly on u feel Hope, I did BEC twice and both end up with a 74! The 2nd time I did it, I thought I was aced it forsure. But I DIDNT! >_<

Also, I did AUD on Nov. 20, I am so worried now that I won't pass AUD too, since I can't judge how well I did on exams based on my feelings. sigh!

[jllocke]

Hope and Others:

It's comforting to hear that others are also having a hard time with the exam. I too have been feeling like a complete failure lately because of these exams. I'm 0 for 7. I have been told I will be terminated if I don't pass an exam within 6 months (which ends Jan 29th). I can honestly say the first 3 exams I took I was not fully committed and did not put the proper time in to pass. The last 4 exams I have taken I have studied my butt off with no success. In the beginning I would tell myself I just didn't put the time in and I could pass if I applied myself fully. After applying myself fully and still not passing I began doubting whether or not I could do this. The last to exams I scored a 70 on FAR and a 68 on REG. These were supposed to be my saving grace, keep my job, pressure off, I can breathe again scores. I thought for sure I passed each. I put more than the recommended amount of study time into the exams and was devastated at the results.

At this point I am trying to look at the bright side. Each time I have tested my score has improved. So I'm not going backwards. That's pretty much the only positive I could find.

So I decided to make a change. I have been using Bisk materials and they obviously are not helping me achieve a passing score. So this weekend I ordered Yaeger and I hope this new material will give me the extra edge I need to pass the exam. I have spent too much time and too much money to give up now!

I just wanted to put my two cents in to let everyone who is in a similar position know they are not alone! I hope to celebrate with you all sometime in 2011 🙂

AUD-69,72 Retake April 2011
BEC-67,69 Retake May 2011
FAR-58,70 Retake (02/28/11)
REG-68 Retake (01/14/11)

[FutureCPA]

Hope, would appreciate an update on your life. At least as it relates to CPA exam. I could really use some words to give me some hope.

I need to pass before busy season.

[Jen-J]

@FutureCPA – click on her user name and click on replies created. She updated later in 2010.

[Author]

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