[MustPass1988]

So I’ve worked at this company for a couple of years and pretty much the whole time, my coworker has treated me as though he’s threatened by me. I’ve caught him talking about me to my manager over things that he blew out of proportion (like for example he tried to schedule a meeting during lunchtime and I said that I was unavailable because I always go to a yoga class during that time and he forwarded the email to my manager saying that this was “typical behavior from me” and that I was always unavailable which is completely untrue ). He micromanages me to the point where he makes me send him drafts of my emails before I send them out to people. Keep in mind, he is NOT my manager in any way, just my coworker. There have actually been several remediations between he and I and my manager but my manager has actually said “I would go to the end of the earth for [coworker]” so he doesn’t do anything about it. My manager constantly tells me that he sees how my coworker treats me and that he’s actually extremely frustrated with him about it, but then doesn’t do anything. The thing that really frustrates me is that my manager tells my coworker everything. I was having health issues and they thought I had a hernia and I needed to go get an ultrasound and I told my manager this, and got an email from my coworker later that day saying “I hope you feel better, I heard that you were having some stomach problems”. So present day: I was offered a job opportunity internally within a different department. I found out on Monday from my manager and then discovered that he told 3 of my coworkers on Friday before even telling me. I was having coworkers asking me about it before I even had a job description or decided to apply! A week later, I decided to apply for it and told my manager beforehand who assured me that he would not tell any coworkers until it was “official”. Two hours later, I got an email from this coworker saying “I’ve heard some news about you, can we have a meeting to discuss this?” I ignored him and then went to my manager and said “you told me that you weren’t going to tell [coworker] until it was official…” and he turned bright red, mumbled something, and then grabbed his phone and went into a conference room to call the coworker. Now, hardly anyone in my department is talking to me, (my manager hasn’t said one word to me today) and I scheduled a meeting with the VP of my group to let him know why I decided to apply for this position. I want to let him know that I’m unhappy about the fact that everyone in the department knew about this opportunity before I did and the way that my manager and coworker talk about me. Any suggestions for ways to bring it up?

AUD: PASSED [81]; Expired, retaking August 23rd
BEC: PASSED [83]; Expired, retaking July 11th
REG: PASSED [83]
FAR: FAILED [64]; Retaking May 23rd

[Anonymous]

I would just smile and continue with my work and application for the new position. Don't let the new department or the VP get wind of any “issues” while you are considering a new position. Just handle it professionally and take the high road. Then, when you get the new job you can thank your lucky stars that you have a fresh start in a new department. Jerks and miserable people are every where. I'm not by any means stating that you shouldn't stand up for yourself…I'm just saying keep your eye on the prize which is the new position. Good luck! I left my last job because my boss wanted to approve every email I sent. I was way too good for him. =)

If that doesn't work…let DRAMA NINJA have them.

[san4596]

I agree with taxman89, do not burn the bridge cause you never know down the road.

I HAVE NEVER SEEN DRAMA NINJA B4!!!! SO COOL!!!

CPA EXAM: DONE!!!!
Ethics Course: Passed
Application Mailed: 3/16/15
Professional Conduct Exam: 97
Certification Date: 4/2/15!!!

[san4596]

I agree with taxman89, do not burn the bridge cause you never know down the road.

I HAVE NEVER SEEN DRAMA NINJA B4!!!! SO COOL!!!

CPA EXAM: DONE!!!!
Ethics Course: Passed
Application Mailed: 3/16/15
Professional Conduct Exam: 97
Certification Date: 4/2/15!!!

[impska]

When you talk to the VP, focus only on the great opportunity – say nothing about the coworker drama. And if it doesn't work out: run, don't walk, toward any other opportunities you can find!

There is no reason to put up with that kind of BS.

REG - 94
BEC - 92
FAR - 92
AUD - 99

[impska]

When you talk to the VP, focus only on the great opportunity – say nothing about the coworker drama. And if it doesn't work out: run, don't walk, toward any other opportunities you can find!

There is no reason to put up with that kind of BS.

REG - 94
BEC - 92
FAR - 92
AUD - 99

[jeff]

How you handle co-worker drama will impact you down the road.

Most people want team members who rise above the pettiness and get stuff done.

Make the best of it – institute a personal no-drama policy – git R done.

Jeff Elliott, CPA (KS) | Another71 | NINJA CPA | NINJA CMA | NINJA CPE

[jeff]

How you handle co-worker drama will impact you down the road.

Most people want team members who rise above the pettiness and get stuff done.

Make the best of it – institute a personal no-drama policy – git R done.

Jeff Elliott, CPA (KS) | Another71 | NINJA CPA | NINJA CMA | NINJA CPE

[sailorangel59]

I would talk to someone in your HR department about your coworkers discussing your health issues. That to me was the biggest red flag about this. I know in my state it is illegal to discuss other peoples medical situations. But that is my opinion on one of the things you brought up.

In the case of the others, I think you can still bring it up to the VP, because gossip can be considered creating a hostile work environment, especially now that no one is talking to you. But you are also moving. So you may have to pick your battles for that one.

[sailorangel59]

I would talk to someone in your HR department about your coworkers discussing your health issues. That to me was the biggest red flag about this. I know in my state it is illegal to discuss other peoples medical situations. But that is my opinion on one of the things you brought up.

In the case of the others, I think you can still bring it up to the VP, because gossip can be considered creating a hostile work environment, especially now that no one is talking to you. But you are also moving. So you may have to pick your battles for that one.

[noleguy]

Wow, for it to be no more than a coworker, it's funny how this person feels the need to “call a meeting to discuss” your leaving. Sounds like this coworker has his nose up the supervisor's “you know what”, and the supervisor has his back. I have been in that situation, and there is no winning. I never just try to “flee the situation”, since you could always encounter that type of thing anywhere you go; but, if it is a job that you think you'd like, and you are “somewhat” sure about the atmosphere being better, I think you have your answer.

[noleguy]

Wow, for it to be no more than a coworker, it's funny how this person feels the need to “call a meeting to discuss” your leaving. Sounds like this coworker has his nose up the supervisor's “you know what”, and the supervisor has his back. I have been in that situation, and there is no winning. I never just try to “flee the situation”, since you could always encounter that type of thing anywhere you go; but, if it is a job that you think you'd like, and you are “somewhat” sure about the atmosphere being better, I think you have your answer.

[Study Monk]

A have had many issues with various careers, because I am vocal about what is going on with me. I hope I've learned that no one really cares. The VP probably considers this drama beneath him, and may have little interest in whether or not you are happy or not.

I spoke to an ancient wise man who sent me on a mushroom induced journey through an ancient forest to find the key to passing the CPA exam. A talking spider monkey told me to throw the last of my drinking water in the dirt to find what I was looking for. So I followed his instructions and the following message appeared in the soil:

"Do 5000 multiple choice questions for each section"

[Study Monk]

A have had many issues with various careers, because I am vocal about what is going on with me. I hope I've learned that no one really cares. The VP probably considers this drama beneath him, and may have little interest in whether or not you are happy or not.

I spoke to an ancient wise man who sent me on a mushroom induced journey through an ancient forest to find the key to passing the CPA exam. A talking spider monkey told me to throw the last of my drinking water in the dirt to find what I was looking for. So I followed his instructions and the following message appeared in the soil:

"Do 5000 multiple choice questions for each section"

[MustPass1988]

Thanks everyone for your advice!! I don't agree with not saying anything- there's definitely a way of going about it without burning bridges or being a tattle. I don't think that sweeping things under the rug is the way to go, especially when it's affecting your career growth and happiness. I don't think it does anyone any favors when you continually ignore a situation and then end blowing up or quitting over it. The VP is in a different office so he is somewhat removed from the department. Obviously there are things to ignore or handle on your own but I've tried both of those things and it's not doing any good. I actually called my coworker out about that email he forwarded to my manager- I called him up and said that I knew he was forwarding my emails and talking behind my back and that if he had a problem with me, I had no way of knowing or fixing it unless he came to me. He immediately hung up the phone and called my manager to talk about what I had just said to him. applied for the position but it's not a certain thing yet so there's a chance I could have to stay in the department. There's definitely a management problem in my department. My manager will actually call this coworker to have his approval on things.

AUD: PASSED [81]; Expired, retaking August 23rd
BEC: PASSED [83]; Expired, retaking July 11th
REG: PASSED [83]
FAR: FAILED [64]; Retaking May 23rd

[MustPass1988]

Thanks everyone for your advice!! I don't agree with not saying anything- there's definitely a way of going about it without burning bridges or being a tattle. I don't think that sweeping things under the rug is the way to go, especially when it's affecting your career growth and happiness. I don't think it does anyone any favors when you continually ignore a situation and then end blowing up or quitting over it. The VP is in a different office so he is somewhat removed from the department. Obviously there are things to ignore or handle on your own but I've tried both of those things and it's not doing any good. I actually called my coworker out about that email he forwarded to my manager- I called him up and said that I knew he was forwarding my emails and talking behind my back and that if he had a problem with me, I had no way of knowing or fixing it unless he came to me. He immediately hung up the phone and called my manager to talk about what I had just said to him. applied for the position but it's not a certain thing yet so there's a chance I could have to stay in the department. There's definitely a management problem in my department. My manager will actually call this coworker to have his approval on things.

AUD: PASSED [81]; Expired, retaking August 23rd
BEC: PASSED [83]; Expired, retaking July 11th
REG: PASSED [83]
FAR: FAILED [64]; Retaking May 23rd

[Author]

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