[jeff]

I was getting requests for a thread like this – so here it is!

Jeff Elliott, CPA (KS) | Another71 | NINJA CPA | NINJA CMA | NINJA CPE

[tbstew]

Hey all! Just thought I'd jump in to this thread, since it applies to me, too.

I'm a husband, father of a two-year old tornado-boy, with another due 11/25/11. I work full time (and then some…), help run all the finances of a small family aerospace company, am a new/first-time homeowner. I'm also in charge of twice-a-week youth activities at church. I can't remember the last time I had “me time”, or just sat and did nothing.

The decision to take on this test came several years after graduating college. I was pretty intimidated by the level of effort that would be required to succeed, so it took me a while to seriously commit. The funny thing is, even then I TOTALLY underestimated the grueling path I was starting on.

Kudos to all of you who manage to find a way to balance your lives to keep things going and still succeed on the exam. Kudos to the rest of you who (like me) allowed your life to be thrown out of balance for a little while in order to hopefully make the future a little brighter.

Thanks for who you are and what you do. It's helpful to know I'm not alone, and that others in my situation have succeeded before me.

Good luck to everyone this next testing window (BEC, here I come!)

AUD - 79
BEC - 88
REG - 87
FAR - 86 - Woot, all done!
Ethics - 100

[yankeeaccountant]

@tbstew,

I am in total agreement: I totally underestimated the focus, time, and determination necessary for this endeavor. This is by far the hardest thing I have done. I also had no idea on how this would affect my family. My kids are older : one in college , one in high school, (both boys–and I wouldn't have it any other way–I love them all over the sky) they are more focused on what is going on in their world, I get that! Funny, the person hit the hardest, was my husband. The CPA is more like a four letter word in my house. So, balance? Hmmmm. I don't think that is present for me in this process. Wish it was though.

I would say kudos to you for hitting this with little ones. That is tough, to say the least. And congrats on the baby on the way:)

Babies are wonderful. Honestly, the cheapest massage for me? Holding a baby! I feel the stress melt away. I am grinning ear to ear thinking about it. Enjoy this wonderful time with your kids.

And best of luck with BEC! I am glad to have BEC and FAR behind me. Although, I will admit, BEC is my fav to study for. I guess it is all the econ. For me, it is back to Audit and REG, I didn't pass either this last window. Actually, still haven't told my hubby I failed REG, can't get the gumption to do so. So, keep it on the down low!!!!!

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

[jeff]

…

Jeff Elliott, CPA (KS) | Another71 | NINJA CPA | NINJA CMA | NINJA CPE

[Anonymous]

How do you get your other half to be supportive? Example: Asked my husband to take the kids to school this morning (6:15AM, which is completely unheard of for me). Got up and started on MC. Smack dab in the middle of it …. Hey can you get our 5 yr old dressed? Frustrating … I do this everyday!! On top of that I work full time (tax department). His answer, well I have to get ready for work. Ugh!!!! His next response was, I (me) should have gotten up at 6AM like I said I was.

I got up early to study so I could benefit from no distraction!!! HELP!!!!!!!!!

[tbstew]

Looks like the forum ate one of my posts! Maybe Jeff should do another Server Gate giveaway (cough…)!

@Countingcarey

I think you had asked about how to help your spouse “understand” the gravity of the whole CPA exam, before the forum monsters gobbled it up.

Phew… I really wish I had some helpful suggestions for you there, but the reality is that this is a question I've really struggled with, myself (in fact, the reason why I jumped into this thread was to hopefully find some insight there).

I have this huge fear that if I sit down with my wife and try to explain to her how incredibly difficult it is to prepare for this exam with lots of interruptions, and that it's really just a short period of time, etc… all she will hear is “You're not helping me! I need you to back off and leave me a lone for a whole year!!” Exagerrating slightly… but you get my point, I think.

The only advice I could give is to find the right time to say something. Don't give in to frustration and lash out. Wait for a time when you're both calm and thinking clearly.

I wish that I had more for you. 🙁

AUD - 79
BEC - 88
REG - 87
FAR - 86 - Woot, all done!
Ethics - 100

[Anonymous]

I have to admit. I'm not the one studying for the CPA exam…it's my husband. First of all, I have to give all you guys so much credit for studying for such a difficult exam. Over the past few years, I've learned to appreciate what those letters really mean. My husband and I have been married 5 years (no kiddos). Of those 2 and a 1/2 years, his head has been in the Becker/Gleim/Wiley books. He has passed Audit and BEC….it's devastating to see him take REG 5 times and get a 73 every time and FAR 4 times and get a 73 every single time as well. I just can't comprehend that he does not go up…its been a consistent 73 for the past year and a half. Its just as painful for me to see these scores as it is for him to know he was just so close…again.

I support the crazy studying since this exam means so much to him. This exam has made us who we are and stronger than we could have ever imagined.

From your opinions (since you all are the ones studying for the exam), how can we, one the other side of the exam support our spouse? Do you ever get to seem them? I sure miss my husband.

Once again, I admire anyone studying for this exam. This exam is surly a test of perseverance.

[hilaryh_88]

Bella:

As you can see from my scores, I was at it for awhile as well. My husband was very patient.

I guess the two main pieces of advice I would give would be:

1. Try not to pressure him or make him feel guilty about having to skip out on “fun stuff” when you know he needs/wants to be studying instead.

2. Try to do something to brighten up or change up his study area. I think it helps to either get a new study spot or revamp it so that the area doesn't become a dreaded spot to have to spend time in.

AUD - 82 Becker
BEC - 75 Becker
REG - 71, 82 Becker
FAR - 66,61,71,74,70 and #6 80!!!! FINALLY DONE!!! 9/20/12
Yaeger and Yaeger CRAM for the final battle!

[Anonymous]

@countingcarey or anyone else with a spouse who doesn't get it.

My husband is a full-time student and is home most of the time. He picks the kids up from school and handles them while I work and when I studied.

I could never study at home. There were times I tried but there are way too many distractions there.

I would just go to my office and study alone there. I felt so guilty about leaving them for entire weekends at a time, but my husband was no help as long as I was physically in the house. It forced him to do laundry, make dinner, grocery shop, and referee the kids. It was hard, but tough love is the way to go.

So now that I am done with the exam, I'm trying to show him how a supportive spouse acts: I take the kids to the movies, we go out and ride bikes, we cook and shop together. He gets plenty of studying done and still has time for Hillbilly Handfishing, I get to enjoy my kids again and we aren't fighting as much.

[Anonymous]

@ hilaryh_88

Thanks for the reply. Those are great suggestions. In the beginning it was hard to skip family events. etc, but now, we know studying for the exam IS priority. There really needs to be a support group for the spouses/significant others! 🙂

[RedRage00]

I was talking to a friend about this after I received my passing scores for this last window….I don't know how people do this with a spouse and/or kids. I'm single and its tough enough. Sure, I ignore my friends when I'm studying but they understand what I am doing. It sucks when you're young, single, and studying during college football season LOL

Good luck to you all. I have mad respect for people doing this with a spouse and/or kids.

Texas CPA
Licensed, March 2012

[Anonymous]

Thanks, RedRage!

[nightmare3983]

RedRage,

It is hard studying for the CPA exam when you're married and have kids, but at the same time, I'm able to focus more and study better knowing that I want to get this out of the way so I can spend my free time with my family. If I were single I bet I'd have much harder time studying.

FAR - 83
AUD - 81
REG - 76 (That was close!)
BEC - 82

[Marivy22]

Re-scheduled FAR for 11/7. This means that my journey will take longer.

Sooooo, since I decided to re-schedule my test, I have been beating myself, because of my lack of concentration during my first 6 weeks of study..By now, you should all know the guilty feeling of leaving every Saturday morning to the library for 6 hours……..

Anyway, I try to keep myself positive. Taking the test on 10/10 would have been a secure fail, so at least I am putting more effort now trying not to have to re-take this test again. It is going to be my first try, but I swear I don't want to see Peter or Tim talking to me about FAR any longer. 😉

Btw, I have a 2 year old boy and all the support of my husband. With all the family out of the country it is only the 3 of us.

Good Luck everyone!!!

AUD – 8/15/11 79!!!!

FAR – 11/7/11

BEC – 1/30/12

REG – ???

Done 😉
Class of 2012!!!!
Lots of prayers and hard work....

[MOM2THREE]

To answer the study material question; I passed BEC with a 75 and REG with an 83 last window using Becker (1st time taking any exam). I work full time, have 3 kids, 10, 2 & 1 and a husband. It can be done but it sucks putting forth the time and not being with my kids as much as I would want to.

In regards to getting a spouse to understand; mine never did until I was waiting on my scores this past window. He saw me get on this forum and next thing I know he is reading it too. I caught him reading it on my phone one day. For the first time he understood that it wasn't just me. He has his PE and he thought he understood because of that but now he realizes how different it is. If your spouse is willing, let them read the forum when people start taking the exam and freaking out about feeling like they failed. It helped mine.

[yankeeaccountant]

@mom2three,

I wish my hubby would have had the same reaction to the forum. No such luck. He keeps getting on my case because I am not acting like I am enjoying the ride. He says I am miserable and should be having fun. I am not sure what to make of that except to say that until you do it yourself, you just don't know. I am certainly not skipping to the library–but more like I am trying to maintain my focus.

I have two kids: 19 and 15, I think he is probably thinking, “Really, CPA now?” We are almost empty nesters–guess my timing is off!!!!

[Author]

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